I thought I would write one last post to bid goodbye to 2009! While we had three family members in ER the good news is that they are all doing well now and I am ready to join some friends in Ft.Lauderdale to usher in 2010! Couldn't have a better ending to 2010 I guess...
cya next year!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Once upon a time.....
...and did they ever live happily thereafter?
Marriage - is it really meant for suffering? Being the first one to get married among my group of friends plus at a tender age, I have never fallen prey to the habit of nagging my friends to graduate from their single status, but what pushed me to write about this is the myriad of misconceptions that people live with, about marriages, and even more dangerous is that they enter a relationship with this overhead. A majority of people believe that marriages are best postponed since life becomes so monotonous and boring. Does that mean that they have assumed that the person with whom they are going to spend the rest of their life will bring no good to their life? or that the romance will outlast?
May be I am over-optimistic.Being single is great, but so is being married. I don't say this to justify my non-single status but with a hope to break the misbelief that marriages are just one additional set of boring responsibilities that you have to drag along with you. While it is not a bed of roses, it certainly is what you make out of it. If it is boring - it is that way because that is how YOU made it. If it is fulfilling - again, that will be due to what you have put in. Boring or nurturing, it is all in the hands of two people who share the relationship. It is a classic example of self fulfilling prophecy. You expect it to lack goodness, and because of your attitude, it most certainly will.
I don't ask girls to get married at 22 and leave everything behind, because marriage is a lot of adjustment and each relationship narrates a different story. However, in this age, when mom-in-laws are so unconditionally supportive, father-in-laws are sweet enough to help you around the kitchen when you come back home tired and husbands who try to be supportive in all the areas, how justifiable is it to label marriage as 'cumbersome' or claim that the goodness is outweighed? If nurtured properly, marriages gives an individual more than he or she gives in. Heavy ROIs!
I agree that attraction goes downwards as you progress in marriage, but what some of us fail to realize is that the as attraction wears off, trust and security kick in. and perhaps it doesn't really wear off, it decreases for time being until you find out that newly discovered quality about your partner that you never thought he/she had.
hmn...so what am I really trying to say here? I guess not much, just wanted to spill out all the thoughts that were triggered and perhaps tell you not to be blinded with other's opinions but do as your heart says? May be..
About the writer: The author is married to a chatter-box. She has survived her husband's poor jokes marathon. She meditates and drinks long-islands to stay sane. She lives on pg 10 of her fairytale book.
Marriage - is it really meant for suffering? Being the first one to get married among my group of friends plus at a tender age, I have never fallen prey to the habit of nagging my friends to graduate from their single status, but what pushed me to write about this is the myriad of misconceptions that people live with, about marriages, and even more dangerous is that they enter a relationship with this overhead. A majority of people believe that marriages are best postponed since life becomes so monotonous and boring. Does that mean that they have assumed that the person with whom they are going to spend the rest of their life will bring no good to their life? or that the romance will outlast?
May be I am over-optimistic.Being single is great, but so is being married. I don't say this to justify my non-single status but with a hope to break the misbelief that marriages are just one additional set of boring responsibilities that you have to drag along with you. While it is not a bed of roses, it certainly is what you make out of it. If it is boring - it is that way because that is how YOU made it. If it is fulfilling - again, that will be due to what you have put in. Boring or nurturing, it is all in the hands of two people who share the relationship. It is a classic example of self fulfilling prophecy. You expect it to lack goodness, and because of your attitude, it most certainly will.
I don't ask girls to get married at 22 and leave everything behind, because marriage is a lot of adjustment and each relationship narrates a different story. However, in this age, when mom-in-laws are so unconditionally supportive, father-in-laws are sweet enough to help you around the kitchen when you come back home tired and husbands who try to be supportive in all the areas, how justifiable is it to label marriage as 'cumbersome' or claim that the goodness is outweighed? If nurtured properly, marriages gives an individual more than he or she gives in. Heavy ROIs!
I agree that attraction goes downwards as you progress in marriage, but what some of us fail to realize is that the as attraction wears off, trust and security kick in. and perhaps it doesn't really wear off, it decreases for time being until you find out that newly discovered quality about your partner that you never thought he/she had.
hmn...so what am I really trying to say here? I guess not much, just wanted to spill out all the thoughts that were triggered and perhaps tell you not to be blinded with other's opinions but do as your heart says? May be..
About the writer: The author is married to a chatter-box. She has survived her husband's poor jokes marathon. She meditates and drinks long-islands to stay sane. She lives on pg 10 of her fairytale book.
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